What is elder abuse, and where do you get help?

Elder abuse is any act, or failure to act, within a relationship of trust that causes harm or distress to an older person. The phrase "relationship of trust" is the part that defines it. Being robbed by a stranger is a crime, but it is not elder abuse. Being pressured by an adult child to hand over money, or neglected by someone who agreed to provide care, is, because the harm comes from someone the person should have been able to rely on. That is what makes it so difficult to recognise and so hard to report.

If someone is in immediate danger, call 000.

For free, confidential advice and support, call the national Elder Abuse phone line on 1800 ELDER Help, 1800 353 374. It connects you to a service in your own state or territory. You can call about your own situation or because you are worried about someone else, and you do not have to have decided to do anything yet.

The main forms it takes

Elder abuse is usually grouped into these categories, and more than one often occurs together.

Financial abuse. The most commonly reported form. It includes taking money or possessions without permission, pressuring someone into changing a will or signing documents, misusing an enduring power of attorney, moving into an older person's home and refusing to contribute or leave, or an "inheritance in advance" arrangement that leaves the older person without enough to live on.

Psychological or emotional abuse. Threats, intimidation, humiliation, shouting, or blackmail such as threatening to withdraw contact with grandchildren. It also covers isolating someone from friends, family or activities, which is often how other forms of abuse are hidden.

Neglect. Failing to provide the basics of care that someone has taken responsibility for, including food, warmth, hygiene, medication, medical care or supervision. Neglect can be deliberate, but it can also happen when a carer is overwhelmed and out of their depth.

Physical abuse. Hitting, pushing, rough handling, restraining someone or misusing medication to sedate them.

Sexual abuse. Any sexual contact or behaviour without consent, including where the person is not able to give consent.

Social abuse. Deliberately cutting someone off from contact with others, which both causes harm in itself and conceals everything else.

Warning signs

No single sign proves abuse is occurring, and there are often innocent explanations. It is a pattern, or a change that does not add up, that should prompt a closer look.

Financial signs include unexplained withdrawals or transfers, unpaid bills when there should be enough money, sudden changes to a will or power of attorney, missing possessions, or a new person taking control of the finances.

Personal and behavioural signs include unexplained injuries, poor hygiene, weight loss, untreated medical problems, becoming fearful or withdrawn, particularly around one specific person, anxiety, depression, or being reluctant to speak while that person is present.

Situational signs include a carer or relative who answers all questions on the older person's behalf, refuses to let them be seen alone, or blocks contact with other family and friends.

Why it stays hidden

Understanding why people do not report it makes it easier to respond well.

Most often the person causing the harm is a family member, frequently an adult child. Reporting means acting against someone you love, and many older people would rather endure the situation than see their child in trouble or lose the relationship entirely. There is often shame, a sense that this reflects badly on them as a parent. There can be fear of retaliation, or of being moved into residential care as the "solution". Some people depend on the person harming them for daily care and cannot see how they would manage without them. And some do not recognise it as abuse at all, because it built up gradually.

If you are supporting someone in this position, that context matters. Pushing a person to report before they are ready often backfires and can drive the situation further underground.

What you can do

If you are experiencing it. Call 1800 353 374. The service is free and confidential, and calling does not commit you to anything. It is not a police report and nothing automatically happens as a result. You can also speak to your GP, who is used to these conversations and can see you alone, or to a trusted friend, your bank, or a community legal centre. Many banks now have specialist teams for exactly this and can put protections on accounts.

If you are worried about someone else. Try to speak with them alone, without the person you are concerned about present. Ask open questions and listen without pressing for a decision. Do not confront the suspected person, which can increase the risk. Keep a private, dated note of what you observe. Then call the helpline yourself for advice on what to do next; you do not need the older person's permission to seek guidance.

If it concerns an aged care service. Complaints about care in a residential aged care home or from a home care provider can be made to the Aged Care Quality and Safety Commission, and can be made anonymously.

Prevention is mostly paperwork and connection

Two things reduce risk more than anything else.

The first is getting the legal documents right, early, and with proper advice. An enduring power of attorney is a powerful instrument, and appointing the wrong person, or appointing someone without any oversight, is a common route into financial abuse. Understanding guardianship and administration matters for the same reason. Getting independent legal advice, rather than using a document someone else has prepared and put in front of you, is the single best protection.

The second is staying connected. Isolation is the condition in which abuse grows, and an older person with a GP they see regularly, friends, and a community group they attend is far harder to harm unnoticed. Our guide to support for elderly people living alone covers practical ways to stay linked in, and you can browse support services and community groups near you on Our Mate.

Frequently asked questions

What counts as elder abuse?

It is any act, or failure to act, within a relationship of trust that harms or distresses an older person. That covers financial, psychological, physical, sexual and social abuse, as well as neglect. Harm from a stranger is a crime but is not classed as elder abuse, because the defining feature is the breach of an existing relationship of trust.

Who is most often responsible?

Most commonly a family member, and adult children are the largest single group. It can also be a partner, another relative, a friend, or a paid carer. That closeness is exactly why it is under-reported.

What is the number for elder abuse help in Australia?

Call 1800 ELDER Help on 1800 353 374. It is a free, confidential national line that directs you to the service in your state or territory. If someone is in immediate danger, call 000 instead.

Is elder abuse a crime?

Some forms clearly are, including physical assault, sexual assault, theft and fraud, and those can be reported to police. Other situations, such as pressure over a will or misuse of a power of attorney, may be dealt with through civil or tribunal processes rather than criminal law. The helpline can explain which options apply in your state.

What should I do if I suspect abuse but I am not certain?

You do not need proof to seek advice. Try to speak with the person alone, listen without pushing them to act, avoid confronting the person you suspect, and make a private dated note of what you notice. Then call 1800 353 374 for guidance on what to do next.